We Follow in Gaston's Ways, We are Especially Good at It, Too.

This post is about a legend. 

 A proud and noble family tradition that began about a hundred years ago, I would guess. My mother and father,sisters and brother, my aunts and uncles, my older and younger cousins were taught as little ones all about this special special thing. I do not know exactly who started it. I dont need to. I just know that it is a well respected and time honored traditon in the Macaluso extended family. It is binding and real. It is just a little bit repulsive, but only because, if taken literally, the distastfulness of it all would be too much to take.

 In my family, if something is desired to be given to us someday, we spit on it. 

 You read that correctly. To claim an item or number of items to be bequeathed to you the habit is to claim it by expectorating! Now, before you decide that this is a family of gross and disgusting people letting loose on fine china bowls and grandfather clocks and hand cut crystal goblets, let me furter explain our methods. We say, "I spit on that". The first person to say those words, with a witness, usually the owner or keeper of the treasure, is the true and rightful recipiant of whatever it may be. Easy as pie! The witness, the owner or keeper of the treasure, will then affirm it and honor the spitee with the item in due time. No quarrels, arguments, ifs, ands, or buts about it.  Why spit? Again, this has an easy and totally logical answer: who in their right mind would ever ever ever want somthing with someone else's spittle on it? It is marked territory. It is DNA protected. It is yours unless or until you decide to give it to another. 

 The list of things I have personally spit on is not long but includes such things as the fabulous Ram's head lamp (a representation of my high school mascot), the panoramic framed shot of the Cottages in Truro, a certain necklace from Tiffany's and the very coveted and somewhat valuable Beanie Baby collection of over 100 squishy soft plush toys. We all have the right to spit, no matter the age, on family heirlooms to be. In my entire liftime there has been only one item I can recall being un-spit-on-able, a well loved and coveted Red Volvo. That is not to say they didnt try, but, that car could only go on so long. 

 It is a great and unique custom that I imagine has few equals. I have no idea, really, what other families do, maybe write things in legal documents.  For us, we just spit.