Be like Tigger

Within the last 7 days I have driven to two family gatherings. The first was the new traditional last blast of summer at my cousins Lee and Jon's home. The second was a funeral in Brooklyn. Over a thousand miles in MammaKia and loads of time to think while traveling to and back from the smiles and tears. However, it was mostly smiles!

Parties and I have always gotten along. I love a good time, am not afraid to jump into the fray and introduce myself, will dance with whomever is out on the floor (and sometimes when no one is out on the floor) and don't really worry too much about people laughing with me. Sometimes they laugh at me and that is OK, too. Sharing a meal or toasting someone with a hearty Salute! is part of the joy of living. Sharing a meal and toasting in memory of someone will also help to say goodbye.

Here is a short list of the shining moments of the last week.
Labor Day Party:
My cousin Max is in 7th grade, we now say hello and goodbye to each other with a single word and a laugh...the word that makes every middle school boy giggle. Moist.
The breadman delivered again...numerous loaves of freshly baked seed covered Italian bread! Sweet Camille sitting and enjoying the band SpiTune at night( The girl makes one heck of a Tabouleh, too! Not bad for a 3rd grader). My uncle talking about his twin grandsons, the "tiny terrorists". Lee's basketful of eyeglasses. Jon's breakfast pitcher of beer. Lois and Kris trying to put a name to whatever it is they call their romance. Our cousins picture, missing lots of cousins.

Saying goodbye in Brooklyn:
Driving into the city and trying to avoid traffic making us so early the only one at the funeral home ahead of us was the undertaker. The nice undertaker making a copy of a picture of my dad and his siblings that he had never seen before (all very young). Seeing the faces of people I havent seen in years and knowing we would pick up right where we left off. My heart skipping a beat as my dad gasped and cried just before we left his sister for the last time. The great words of the priest who likened leaving this world for the next with hope as a caterpillar becomes a butterfly in the hope a different more beautiful life. Watching the sun reflect off of the skyscrapers in the Manhattan skyline from the driveway of Calvary Cemetery. Sharing an amazing lunch with my Father's family, memories and catching up. Holding my Aunt Frances' brand new great-granddaughter...someone leaves us but another joins us. I think this is called the circle of life.

So, in a very cliche way I will tell you that my heart is full. I will cherish these last days of summer; the fun and the pain, the laughter and the tears, the hugs and the teasing. My memory bank is growing and this past week was a huge deposit.

Here is my toast to us all...Be like Tigger, rejoice in life and have fun. Reconnect whenever you can, share the hugs and the jokes. Appreciate the moments of your life. Look again at and love those that share your genes; it is a connection no one should sever. Be there for each other. Be willing to laugh and to cry together. Have faith in the fact that one day we will get out of this cocoon and take flight. Hope that the view you have for eternity is half as good as the one my aunt has! Put a little Anisette into your coffee. Salute!

Where you just have to wish to make it so.

Look up sometimes and you see the darnedest things. A cloud that looks like an ice cream cone. The lacy canopy of leaves on a summer day. The northern lights. So many times we fail to look up.

When I was younger I could look up into the girders and cables that held the George Washington Bridge suspended over the Hudson River and marvel at the idea of it. I could look up at the planes flying over the city on the way into Brooklyn. I could look up into the eyes of my father as I danced on his feet.

One of the best up things was Tar Beach. The rooftop of the house on Union Street was Tar Beach, along with every other rooftop in large cities. It is a small refuge at the top of the building. It always was such a cool idea to think of all the people who went up there to relax and get a little sun or look at the skyline or the stars. I only went there a handful of times but it was a bit of an adventure. We started up the stairs, a few flights of climbing, all the way up and through to the ceiling where there was a doorway that took you up on the roof. Just like the song. The view was great, you could see for miles, into other boroughs, into other peoples back yards down below, to the house where the pigeons were kept in their cages and let out to fly around in formation and then return home, where some people could keep a rooftop garden. My mother and her sisters and friends could sunbathe up there. You could dream up there or maybe have a romantic moment or two. I know we watched the fireworks up there once. Up on the tar papered roof.

Right before the old brownstone was sold, on the last day of cleaning it out the roof was visited one more time. The picture of Aunt Lois is beautiful and bitter sweet as she stands up there one last time. The sky is blue and almost cloudless, Manhattan is in the distance and it is serene. "On the roof's,the only place I know, where you just have to wish to make it so...". I think I know what I would wish for. One more time; up on the roof.